Games have at all times predicted the top of humanity. Zombie hordes, robots gaining sentience and taking on, nuclear winters, humanity self destructing, Earth getting hit with a meteorite, pandemics, you identify it there’s a game predicting it.
It appears that game studios know one thing we don’t and their service awards have uncovered them – handing out shields, helmets, and even swords to devoted staff. What higher manner for game studios to point out its appreciation of your abilities than equipping you with objects for surviving the inevitable apocalypse – so form of them.
You might need to work a number of jobs concurrently to get your arms on all of them however you’ll be kicking your self when the worlds begins to fall into chaos occurs and also you don’t have your Frostmourne sword or Cyberpunk 2077 samurai jacket to maintain you protected. Whatever finish of the world occasion is coming, zombies, aliens, robots, monsters, we’ve obtained you lined. Here’s the place you have to dedicate your profession so you’ll be able to survive the upcoming apocalypse.
Blizzard – ring, sword, defend, helm
Blizzard is the right place to begin, they’ve a number of dedication awards which are important for surviving the apocalypse. After two years you get a tankard, which seems to be very good however we’re prepping for the top of the world right here so it’s the 5 years and better awards that it is best to have your eye on. If you’re employed at Blizzard for 5 years you get a sword, only a straight up lethal sword. The design modifications every year so fingers crossed that you just get one thing like Frostmourne from World of Warcraft.
After 10 years you get a beautiful shiny defend to match your sword. It’s tough to inform how sturdy it’s from Blizzard’s web site but when it’s a nuclear winter state of affairs it seems to be like it will make an amazing sledge.
Continuing into 15 years, you obtain a hoop which I’m hoping possesses magical properties definitely worth the fifteen yr dedication. But, the last word reward after working for 20 years is a glistening, silver helm primarily based on Diablo 3’s Archangel Imperius. Now that will defend your noggin from any apocalyptic nasties.
CD Projekt Red – Samurai jacket from Cyberpunk 2077
Now is that is what I’m speaking about, a custom made jacket by CD Projekt Red simply screams punk apocalypse. Matseuz Tomaszkiewivz acquired this current from the Polish game firm after working there as quest director for 10 years. The leather-based samurai jacket is from the studio’s upcoming game Cyberpunk 2077 and contains a sharp tusked robot-demon on the again.
Got a kewl Samurai jacket as a present on my 10th anniversary at @CDPROJEKTRED <3 pic.twitter.com/nmH89CLpap
— Mateusz Tomaszkiewicz (@MTomaszkiewicz) December 20, 2018
Alongside the jacket Tomaszkiewivz additionally acquired a black briefcase that may work as a bludgeon in a pinch. But. the jacket seems to be sturdy and is a superb begin to your apocalyptic wardrobe. Think of all the road cred you’ll get. So, your preparation is coming alongside fairly properly, however you’ll be able to by no means have too many weapons. Two swords are higher than one.
CCP Games – Viking Sword
Blizzard’s 5 yr service sword is sweet however does it compete with a real Viking sword? That’s what you obtain after working at Eve Online developer CCP games for 10 years. Due to Icelandic legislation you’re not legally allowed to own weapons, so when you find yourself given your blade it has to remain on CCP’s epic sword wall – which you’ll see in its office tour video. But when the apocalypse begins and everybody begins panicking simply seize yours off the wall, smash open the field, and also you’re prepared for battle.
From the glimpse within the video – seen at 02:18 – the sword seems to be to be a typical Viking sword with a single-handed hilt, cross guard and fabricated from iron. Very good. Coupled with Blizzard’s sword, you’re now outfitted for any alien invasion or robotic take over that will come up and you may change between the 2 swords like a submit apocalyptic Geralt of Riviera.
Activision Blizzard – Engraved silver controllers
Reddit consumer MaxTurnbull showed off his dad’s present from Activision Blizzard after working there for 15 years. His award was six iconic game controllers engraved in silver and framed, displayed in all their glory.
Taking the Mickey
With Disney being a multi-billion company you’ll count on their service awards would assist properly in direction of your post-apocalyptic prep. Well, suppose once more. After 60 years of service Oscar Martinez acquired a Cinderella statue, not precisely my weapon of alternative.
I do know what you’re pondering. How can some silver engraved controllers assist me within the brutal hellscape that would be the apocalypse? Well give it some thought, assuming that the financial system will collapse and cash turns into out of date you’ll want one thing to commerce with. Everyone desires a pleasant little bit of silver. Also, what if it’s a vampire/werewolf apocalypse state of affairs like in Castlevania?
Melt it all the way down to make silver bullets or a pleasant stake. If all else fails, then additionally they look fairly heavy so you might chuck it at a beasty in hopes of doing a little injury or be part of two of the controllers collectively and create a pair of awkward nunchucks – the apocalypse is the right time to get inventive.
BioWare – Character statues
The similar smelting and buying and selling plan also can apply to BioWare’s service awards trophies. Starting at 5 years you get a statue of Dragon Age’s Varric Tethras, after 10 you get Mass Effects bounty hunter Wrex, at 15 years you get Commander Shepard (FemShep), and at last at 20 years you get a statue of the High Dragon. These statues would show so properly in your desk, act as the right centerpiece to any show, or act as a refined flex for onlookers at a celebration. But these instances are gone and the social gathering’s over so that you higher get on with melting these unhealthy boys down.
BioWare doesn’t state what the statues are made out of however describes them as “heavy” so the optimist in me says they’re bronze. After a fast scan on IForgeIron.com evidently bronze will be tough to smelt so if that fails then the buying and selling/bludgeoning route may be higher.
Read extra: Check out our record of the best zombie games on PC
If you’ve adopted this information then you have to be outfitted with a doubtlessly magical ring, a flashy defend, one metal sword, one iron sword, a sturdy leather-based jacket, silver and bronze buying and selling supplies, and – to finish the look – a badass helm.
You’ve labored at Blizzard for 20 years, Bioware for 20 years, Activision for 15 years, CCP Games for 10 years, and CD Projekt Red for 10 years. That’s a grand whole of 75 years of consecutive work, congratulations! You can lastly retire and relaxation straightforward understanding that you’re now prepared for the inevitable apocalypse.
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