Random Select is Polygon’s weekly deep dive into the obscure. Our editors pick a title at random, and a writer is tasked with playing it for at least one hour to provide an unfiltered, honest assessment. This week, we’re venturing into the pixelated dangers of Haunted Lands, a 2D side-scrolling shoot-’em-up.
Navigating the sea of over 12,000 “shoot ’em up” titles on Steam is a daunting task. While the genre is rooted in the golden age of arcades, modern developers frequently attempt to recapture that vintage magic. Haunted Lands distinguishes itself by blending classic projectile combat with 2D platforming elements reminiscent of the original Metroid, offering just enough mechanical depth to rise above its peers.
Make no mistake: the experience is grueling. Progress in Haunted Lands is a slow, methodical crawl where success is measured in inches. You’ll spend your time memorizing enemy spawns, telegraphing attack patterns, and inevitably restarting. With a fragile health pool of only four hits, even the smallest oversight is catastrophic. While enemy logic is predictable once learned, the challenge of managing precise platforming while under fire ensures your focus never wavers.
During my initial hour, I reached the game’s first major gatekeeper—a formidable, fire-wielding sorcerer inhabiting a room filled with environmental hazards. Despite having my ultimate ability ready—a high-velocity automatic weapon—the boss made quick work of me. The encounter demands perfection, punishing every misplaced jump with a swift trip back to the start.
While the shotgun-wielding veteran is the standard choice, players can experiment with a Mage or a Beast. The Mage utilizes chain lightning for area damage, whereas the Beast is a dedicated melee fighter. However, these classes felt significantly more restrictive; the Mage’s limited range forces you into dangerous proximity, and the Beast lacks the defensive agility required to survive the game’s chaotic close-quarters combat.
Exploration is encouraged through hidden caches of gold, silver, and vital shield upgrades. While the early loot feels somewhat pedestrian, the incentive to poke around the corners of the map is there. That said, the level design isn’t always forgiving; I spent a frustrating several minutes wedged between a stone pillar and a patch of damaging vines, a reminder that the environment is just as lethal as the enemies.
If you have a penchant for retro-styled 2D action, Haunted Lands is a worthwhile investment, particularly given its modest price point ($4.79 on Steam). While I usually enjoy the high-stakes challenge of Soulslikes, the specific brand of frustration found in this genre isn’t quite for me. However, for those with the patience to master its rhythmic lethality, there is plenty here to enjoy.
Source: Polygon
