Superhot is finally out, and good golly, it’s great. Most people seem to agree, because the official Superhot clip site, Killstagram, and the Superhot subreddit are already spilling over with gifs that would make John Wick cry. For the uninitiated, none of these are happening in real time. In Superhot, time only moves when you do, but the game smashes together a ‘real time’ gif of each scenario afterwards. It’s basically your own personal highlight reel, a reminder that, heck yeah, you’re a cool, smooth action hero. Still, some action heroes are smoother and cooler than others, so here’s a small slice of what we should all aspire to.
Drinks are on this guy!
I know that a good chunk of the hype surrounding Superhot is about how it takes the FPS formula, chops it, screws it, remixes it, and spits out something super fresh (hot, you might say), but what about Root Beer Tapper? This player knows what I’m talking about. Check out those drink serving skills. Someone’s getting a good tip!
A shaky definition of pacifism
In this impressive clip, the player manipulates the enemies into shooting one through a series of precise dodges. It’s a pretty clever approach to beating the scenario, I just can’t help but wonder what kind of bad guy shooting training these bad guys have. Step one: when you see the good guy, shoot in their direction. Step two: uhhh. I think the bad guy academy is low on funding.
The creator of this clip calls it a Jedi fantasy. I’m just not sure that Jedis feel the pull to slice up every projectile coming their way. They certainly don’t swing with that kind of fervent urgency, like they dropped their penny collection at a penny convention. Then again, I haven’t read the extended universe stuff.
Bored action hero
In the same scenario, this player just dodged all the bullets, or maybe the bullets just didn’t want to hit him. Look at them go, zooming by like they have some place to be. You’ll get to where you’re going, bullets! Just chill, enjoy the bullet ride. Yeesh. You only fire once.
No class, broken glass
Here’s another go at that same hallway scenario, but this delinquent takes a different route entirely. They smash a few windows and dance on the edge of a skyscraper to reach the enemies. Slicing up bullets is one thing, but smashing up windows? I know you’re trying to survive, just do it with some class, you darn hooligan.
I love katana
You love katana. We all love katana. More games need katanas. It’s the only sword you can pose with and look cool, it’s the only sword I want to chop up fruit with, and it’s the only sword that can cut through dozens of red cybermen without losing its sheen. Always sharp, always digital, always cool: Katanas.
Bravery isn’t standing up for yourself. It’s not taking a chance and trying something new. It’s not walking a tightrope between two skyscrapers. Bravery is throwing your katana a long distance with the intent of it bouncing it off something so you can catch it mid-air.
Your new screensaver
Not that screensavers are a thing anymore. Are they? Anyway, put on your favorite pump up jams and let this infinite bullet-dodging gif take the wheel. I’m feeling like Jock Jams, short shorts, high socks, and Superhot were meant to be, but your combos may vary.
This clip sums up Superhot better than anything I’ve seen.. A bunch of dudes wearing hokey sunglasses getting punched. Poetry.